Challenge from AutoCrit
I decided to sign up to try my hand at a challenge before AutoCrit and had so much fun I signed up for another one. But this one is different as the people of AutoCrit gives you the first sentence, a twist, and then the last sentence that you have to incorporate into your story. The first line and last line have to be word for word for the story and you have to show the twist. I was given permission to change the last line to fit my story more appropriately.
So I will tell you the information they gave me and then I will copy and paste my story from Microsoft Word on here. I will also do each chapter in a new blog so that this one doesn’t get so long. I hope you enjoy my short story.
First Line- The attack was over in seconds.
Twist- Your story must not contain physical violence.
Last Line- Far too many people put their faith in me.
My Story
Chapter 1
“The attack was over in seconds.”
A shaky hand lifted a goblet of red wine, red and thick as blood. It was lifted to the dry lips hidden behind an untamed red beard. The man sipped the wine, letting the wine slip slowly down his throat before he sat the goblet with skull bones on the side back down on the worn wooden table. Piercing blue eyes stared at the faces around him and he lowered his gaze to the goblet. He slid the goblet from side to side, waiting for a moment as he collected his thoughts about what he and his men had experienced.
“What happened?” someone in the crowd asked, hanging on the older gentleman’s words.
“I don’t rightfully know, Pete,” the man said. “Me crew and I were just sailin’ the stars, lookin’ for the planet they call Sunstone. I had, uh, acquired a map for the planet and they rumored that there be a treasure hidden deep within the belly of the planet itself.” The man stopped talking, silently enjoying the masses around him as they hung on his every word.
The patrons of The Salty Siren scooted their chairs closer to the Captain of the ship known as Angel of Death as he told his story of what happened to his crew and his ship. Outside the tavern, a ship slowly ascended from the stars into a spot, the crew cheering to get some ale in their stomach. The anchor sailed down until it hit the bottom of the wooden spot. It caught it on a ledge so that the ship wouldn’t float away into outer space.
A new crew with their captain walked into the tavern. The captain, an older gray-haired man with steel-gray eyes, scanned the room and stopped when he saw the captain with the wild red hair and sunburned skin. He raised his furry eyebrows and smirked. “Is that me ol’ matey, Captain Archie Dreadful?”
Captain Dreadful looked at the doors and jumped from his seat. “Captain Chester Diggins?”
The two captains embraced and patted one another’s backs before Captain Dreadful took his seat again. He gestured for Captain Diggins and his men to sit with him at his table. Captain Diggins looked around as he sat, noticing that his friend seemed to be alone and more disheveled looking than he had ever seen him. He narrowed his wrinkled eyes as a wench came to ask him what he wished to drink.
“Ale for me and the lads, missy. And another, let me guess, red wine?” He glanced at Archie, who nodded. “Another glass of red wine for me matey.”
While the wench went to get the drinks, Captain Diggins turned to face his ol’ shipmate. “Archie, where are yer men? And yer ship? My eyes didn’t see the ol’ gal outside.”
A tiny pirate in the back of the group squeezed through. “He be telling us what had happened, Cap’n Diggins, as ye and yer crew walked in.”
Captain Diggins looked at the pale lad. “What happened? What do ya mean, lad?”
The skinny pirate scratched his messy black hair and looked back at Captain Dreadful. “We don’t know yet, Cap’n. But by the state Cap’n Dreadful came in shakin’ and sputterin’ words, somethin’ big happened that has frightened the man.”
Captain Dreadful nodded. “As I was saying, the attack was over in seconds. Me and me crew were sailin’ to the planet Sunstone to find the treasure.” He tapped a dirty finger against the base of the goblet. “We had been sailin’ for quite a few days and the lads were getting’ restless. I stopped at the closest planet so we could get off me ship and relax a bit before we moved on.” Archie sipped his wine after the young lass poured more in and looked at his friend. “They be gone! Me crew, me ship, and almost me.”
“Yer not makin’ any sense, Archie. Start from the beginnin’ and tell us what happened,” Chester said. He took a swig of his ale, hoping it would calm his own nerves. Something about his old friend had him all riled up.
Archie shivered as he remembered what had happened. “We landed on the dark planet of Hugo. It be a quiet planet, but we’d been there before and we enjoyed it. Me matey’s were off explorin’ while me First Mate, David Shellings, and I were takin’ inventory of our goods. We wanted to make sure we still had enough food and drink for the trip to Sunstone and back to our home on the planet Dragoro.” He grasped onto his goblet and narrowed his eyes. “We never ran into any trouble on Hugo, but this day was different.” Archie looked at his friend, Chester, dead in the eye. “They’re back, Chester, and they came for me and me crew.”
